The Jefferson Caption Contest

The blog http://intherightplace.blogspot.com/ had a blog contest
to add captions under Congressman Jefferson's AP picture.

Here are a few of the captions they are very funny!


-- "I was saving that money so I could move to the East Side and get that deluxe apartment in the sky."

radio free fred


-- "I told Weezie to tell Lionel to keep his allowance in the safe, NOT THE FREEZER!"

Bill W.


The "This Is Only Happening to Me Because I'm ______" Dept.:

-- "This is only happening because I'm gay, right?"

walrus


-- "It's because I'm Jewish, isn't it?"

McGehee


-- "It's because I'm a lesbian, isn't it?"

walrus


-- "It's because I'm retarded, isn't it?"

Carl


-- "It's because am a Faux-Native-American, plagiarizing, scholarly fraud, isn't it?"

walrus


-- "It's because I'm from the planet Calufrax, isn't it?"

McGehee


The "Johnny Cochran Memorial Defense Fund" Dept.:

-- "If the baggies don't fit, you must acquit."

the man

-- "If it's from the freezer, you must free the geezer;
If the cash is frost-bit, you must acquit;
If the cash is cold, the investigation is on hold;
If you've been in my ice tray, the search'll be thrown away;
If its iced like snow, you must let it go;
If the package said Popsicle, I'll get an acquital."

Rodney Dill


HONORABLE MENTION:

-- "It's getting hard out here for a pimp."

Bob


-- "I was demonstrating the principle of cold, hard cash."

Carl


-- "Listen, Beenie-Weenie left in the freezer too long develops mold that looks just like cash. There's no story here at all!"

-- "They fell for my plan, hook, line and sinker! You see, the whole thing was a reverse sting operation. I set out to prove that the FBI targets people of color on these corruption investigations..."

D. Carter


-- "You see, it's like this: How else can you cool off 'hot' money?"

-- "I was part of a product test for these new Ziplock freezer bags..."

-- "George Bush's economy is so bad that I was anticipating a bank failure."

-- "I was beta testing Al Gore's lockbox."

Doc


-- When asked about his "frozen assets", Jefferson replied, "Look, I like my bills nice and crisp."

-- "When I am cleared of these cold-hearted charges, I will spend the rest of my life searching for the person or persons who planted that money in my freezer."

don


-- "I got an e-mail saying that this guy in Iraq came across $15 Million, and he'd give me a share of it if I helped him get to America..."

GOP and College


-- After the press conference, paramedics treated Rep. Jefferson's hand for freezer burn.

hatless in hattiesburg


-- "It depends on the meaning of the word 'bribery'..."

MFG


-- "I'm innocent until they prove me guilty in court, which will take weeks... Well, that's not exactly what I meant to say, but you guys in the media know what to write... spin it for me, wouldja?"

-- "Hey, man, the OTHER William Jefferson got away with this sort of crap all the time!"

-- "Well, I gave $9,000 to Hillary for stock trading tips, and I invested $1,000... and, well, YOU do the math!"

Steve O


-- "You people are all focusing on 'bribery this' and 'illegal funds that' and missing the big picture. The Right Place Caption Contest was late this week..."

-- "It's a good thing they don't know that I use the money to support my gambling and crack habits... Did I just say that out loud?"

-- "On the bright side, I saved a ton of money by switching to Geico."

-- "Enough about the money, I'm still missing a boot from the hurricane flooding, any of you guys seen it?"

walrus


THE TOP TEN:

#10: Above, a politician of unknown party affiliation deflects attention from the Abramoff scandal, which some say touches all elements of the corrupt Republican Party, as President Bush's ratings fall below 35% for the 4th time this month. In other news, a former Special Forces Army Ranger Pilot speaks out against the Iraq war.

Steve O


#9: "How did that money get in my freezer? Well, as near as I can figure, the National Guardsmen I sent to my house during the hurricane must have taken out a pizza and left the money as payment."

D. Carter


#8: "I wuz gonna return it just as soon as global warming thawed it out."

Rodney Dill


#7: "If I say it came from 'cattle futures', will ya'll leave me alone?"

walrus


#6: "If it's from the Frigidaire, I got it fair and square."

Rodney Dill


#5: "Well, at least it wasn't from Abramoff."

walrus


#4: "They can keep the money. I just want my Swanson Mostly White Meat Turkey Dinner back."

MagicalPat


#3: "I collected that money for the Gloria Wise Boys and Girls Club."

Steve O


#2: "The man said it was a bunch of dead presidents. I was just keepin' them cryogenically frozen... until they could be cured."

spacemonkey


And the winning entry for this Caption Contest...


#1: "Crap! That means my safe deposit box is gonna smell like rotten hamburger."

Rodney Dill